The Value of a Good Girlfriend
- By Alaska Guide
- Published 11/4/2008
Alaska Guide
I am living the life of adventure in the last frontier... okay sometimes I am just living right NEXT to the life of adventure, but I try to mix it up a bit. Towering mountains, crazy abundant wildlife, glaciers, tundra, and the PEOPLE! Everyone has a story worth hearing around here.
With all due respect to “Mytu Sense,” I have to disagree with her take on girl friendships. Women, throughout history, have helped each other through hardships and loss. I believe our basic biology necessitates the female community. Competition among women is a more recent phenomenon that tears at the fabric of our natural tendencies.
While "Mytu" is right that there should be no confusing a girl friendship with the bonds of marriage, your spouse (or partner) and your dependants should always be your first priority, a circle of good girlfriends can improve every aspect of your life and even save a marriage that might otherwise not survive the pressures of having children, economic downturns, etc.
In recent times, people (especially those in the US) have moved further and further away from each other. Extended families that used to cohabitate now have an individual dwellings for each finger of the family. This has separated the women who traditionally leaned on each other for emotional support through child raising years and strained relationships with our spouses/partners. Women are now looking to their spouses to fulfill their social needs, and men are not built to be the social butterflies that women are. “It takes a Village” is not just a book title, it is a philosophy.
My best girlfriends consist of 2 women that I have known since 1980 (Hmmm… 28 years now). One lives in France with her husband and 5 children and the other in Seattle with her husband and 3 children. I have other dear friends
that I have made along the way that reside here in Anchorage and all over. When I have had a rough day, my husband knows me well enough to say, “Why don’t you call ____?” (fill in the blank with YOUR best girlfriends name). He knows that a chat session with one of them can turn my bad day into a good one, making me a better partner for him through the rest of the evening.
Sometimes I dream of my impossible, but perfect, world. Call me a hippy, but a little community out in the wilderness with 5 or 6 cabins and a big communal cabin in the center is my dream. I fill my imaginary cabins with my dearest friends and their families, living and raising our children together, our families blending into a community that supports and cares for each other.
My husband is not threatened by my girlfriends. And, although my hubbie is the darling of the century, none of my girlfriends would so much as flirt with him (nor I with their guys). If your girlfriends are crossing the line, it is not an indicator that girlfriends are bad… just THOSE girlfriends.
A good girlfriend will come over when you have a baby and cook a meal, do your laundry and clean the kitchen (and you do the same for them in turn). A good girlfriend will listen as you complain about your spouse or partner after a spat, but never say anything bad about him or her themselves. A good girlfriend will cry with you, laugh with you, and not judge you when you have a bad mommy or wife moment. A good girlfriend will call you when you haven’t spoken for too long and remembers your birthday every year, even if it is just with a phone call. A good girlfriend is worth her weight in gold.
While "Mytu" is right that there should be no confusing a girl friendship with the bonds of marriage, your spouse (or partner) and your dependants should always be your first priority, a circle of good girlfriends can improve every aspect of your life and even save a marriage that might otherwise not survive the pressures of having children, economic downturns, etc.
In recent times, people (especially those in the US) have moved further and further away from each other. Extended families that used to cohabitate now have an individual dwellings for each finger of the family. This has separated the women who traditionally leaned on each other for emotional support through child raising years and strained relationships with our spouses/partners. Women are now looking to their spouses to fulfill their social needs, and men are not built to be the social butterflies that women are. “It takes a Village” is not just a book title, it is a philosophy.
My best girlfriends consist of 2 women that I have known since 1980 (Hmmm… 28 years now). One lives in France with her husband and 5 children and the other in Seattle with her husband and 3 children. I have other dear friends
Sometimes I dream of my impossible, but perfect, world. Call me a hippy, but a little community out in the wilderness with 5 or 6 cabins and a big communal cabin in the center is my dream. I fill my imaginary cabins with my dearest friends and their families, living and raising our children together, our families blending into a community that supports and cares for each other.
My husband is not threatened by my girlfriends. And, although my hubbie is the darling of the century, none of my girlfriends would so much as flirt with him (nor I with their guys). If your girlfriends are crossing the line, it is not an indicator that girlfriends are bad… just THOSE girlfriends.
A good girlfriend will come over when you have a baby and cook a meal, do your laundry and clean the kitchen (and you do the same for them in turn). A good girlfriend will listen as you complain about your spouse or partner after a spat, but never say anything bad about him or her themselves. A good girlfriend will cry with you, laugh with you, and not judge you when you have a bad mommy or wife moment. A good girlfriend will call you when you haven’t spoken for too long and remembers your birthday every year, even if it is just with a phone call. A good girlfriend is worth her weight in gold.
